I said disappointed, not mad. I'm not angry with you, but frustrated. I wish to ask something of you, Eponine, if you'll do me the courtesy of considering it.
I know I'd promised to sign with you, and now I can't, but I'd like you to think about it as if I could. I want you to come to me if you ever feel like shouting at someone or screaming your beratement when you're worried for them. You might yell at me about it all you want, and save yourself trouble from the city and from those you continue to hurt with your behaviour.
you know, I didnt mean it. I am just so cross with this place. that it has driven Malcolm to murder but also what they have done to him. I am not surprised what they done to him, honestly. you know yourself the punishment at home. but I am SO cross with them for doing it to such a nice boy. and I dont even care about the stupid electric shocks ill get for saying it. I hate this place. and im cross with him. im so cross with Malcolm. HE brought up murder and went mad at me and I was only telling him how to not get caught. And yet he does it anyway. Because Malcolm knows best. He makes me want to slap his face. I wasn't saying it to be pathetic or show off. I wanted him to not be in this situation. You know how I mean?
Why are you so nice to me? D'Artagnan, you are so good to me. I wish we could contract together: gokudera's gonna get rid of me and I dont know who will have me then. ive fucked up with ororo. she told me to leave. I mess up with everyone. and I dont mean to. I am sorry you know?
[He'll not address all of her explanations or self-pity, lest Eponine spiral into unnecessary excuses and repeat herself until he gives up. D'Artagnan suspects she'd heard him very well in the past, every time he's made reassurances for her or dismissed the severity of her actions, and there's little point to allowing her the comfort of his words again when they'll serve no purpose but flattery and placation.]
Because I care for you, Eponine, and I know you can be better. You've need of an outlet for your emotions should they start to overwhelm and rule you. I know what that's like. I wasn't that very different at your age and I promise you, you can overcome it. But you can't shut out everyone who wants to help you, because I don't think you can do it on your own, and you've very few left who will be patient with you.
I've a proposal. I've yet to sign a contract myself, but have a prospect, and I might ask that she consider taking you as well, if you do find yourself without one. We may not contract, but you might live with me and let me help you.
[It's detrimental for him to do so, to make a potential contract with Eponine a caveat for his own surrender to a Dominant, but he will do it.]
[Eponine can scarcely comprehend that anyone would potentially sacrifice that much for her.]
who is it? But anyway you can’t do it. You cannot sacrifice it for me. What if she says no and won’t contract with you. I will be fine. I’m always fine. Do not worry, D’Artagnan. I will be well.
I'll not give you her name as I don't wish you bothering her. Should she decline my request, I've two months to find another option. I'll respect your wishes, of course, but I implore you not to make your decision with haste.
I think I fucked up with her. And I think, perhaps, she has lost her powers. Do you think she’s got a citation? She went mad when I said the people with magic do nothing. Do you think she’s been getting citations all this time?
She has lost the ability to use them for a time, and it was a punishment. No further details will be discussed with you, and I'll ask that you refrain from speculating on her personal affairs, thank you.
If you wish to know, ask her yourself. I'm not giving you favour in this, Eponine. You're to learn 'no' is often without latitude towards further enquiry.
A gag for a week and a shock collar for three. Every time I insult a dominant or the city, I am shocked with a stronger shock than the last. My punishments are always so long. It’s not fair.
If you've the intent to return to the Up in a matter of days, you might. You can't stay with me, however. I'm certain they're monitoring things with the device they've given me.
[He mostly wouldn't care for himself, but he does have a roommate and he'll not drag the woman into citations with Eponine.]
he said he might end our contract because I dont love him. but he doesn't love me. but he wants me to love him anyway. Why should I let my heart break again and again because he wants someone else to love him when he already has two boyfriends?
now he's saying its up to me and honestly D'Artagnan, my head is all over. all I want is to drink myself into oblivion and curl up with my bottle on a doorstep until morning.
It is up to you. Either you wish to sign with him again, or you don't. But as I've said about other options, do not make your decision hastily. I'd prefer you not drink yourself into oblivion on a doorstep, but if you wish to, at least tell me which one, so I might come collect you in the morning.
im not going home. He’ll do my head in and I’m already being shocked for texting him back. I’ll end up with my head blown off or something when I slap him.
You know the community centre? There’s a doorway there. That one or in a building by the Obelisk. They’re all empty there
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Re: text; un: dartagnan
[If a gag wasn’t blocking her mouth, she’d be scowling.]
Ororo is mad at me. Malcolm is mad at me. I don’t need you too.
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I know I'd promised to sign with you, and now I can't, but I'd like you to think about it as if I could. I want you to come to me if you ever feel like shouting at someone or screaming your beratement when you're worried for them. You might yell at me about it all you want, and save yourself trouble from the city and from those you continue to hurt with your behaviour.
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and I dont even care about the stupid electric shocks ill get for saying it. I hate this place.
and im cross with him. im so cross with Malcolm. HE brought up murder and went mad at me and I was only telling him how to not get caught. And yet he does it anyway. Because Malcolm knows best. He makes me want to slap his face. I wasn't saying it to be pathetic or show off. I wanted him to not be in this situation. You know how I mean?
Why are you so nice to me? D'Artagnan, you are so good to me. I wish we could contract together: gokudera's gonna get rid of me and I dont know who will have me then.
ive fucked up with ororo. she told me to leave. I mess up with everyone. and I dont mean to. I am sorry you know?
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Because I care for you, Eponine, and I know you can be better. You've need of an outlet for your emotions should they start to overwhelm and rule you. I know what that's like. I wasn't that very different at your age and I promise you, you can overcome it. But you can't shut out everyone who wants to help you, because I don't think you can do it on your own, and you've very few left who will be patient with you.
I've a proposal. I've yet to sign a contract myself, but have a prospect, and I might ask that she consider taking you as well, if you do find yourself without one. We may not contract, but you might live with me and let me help you.
[It's detrimental for him to do so, to make a potential contract with Eponine a caveat for his own surrender to a Dominant, but he will do it.]
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[Eponine can scarcely comprehend that anyone would potentially sacrifice that much for her.]
who is it?
But anyway you can’t do it. You cannot sacrifice it for me. What if she says no and won’t contract with you. I will be fine. I’m always fine. Do not worry, D’Artagnan. I will be well.
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I'll not give you her name as I don't wish you bothering her. Should she decline my request, I've two months to find another option. I'll respect your wishes, of course, but I implore you not to make your decision with haste.
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You know, don’t answer so. But if it is Ororo forget it. I wouldn’t contract with her for anything. I love her too much to do that to her.
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It's not Ororo.
[He loves her, he does, and should she have asked him right away he may have said yes, but upon reflection over the last month...]
I don't think I'd sign with her, for the same reason. It's too much of a risk.
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I think I fucked up with her. And I think, perhaps, she has lost her powers. Do you think she’s got a citation? She went mad when I said the people with magic do nothing. Do you think she’s been getting citations all this time?
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How long is she without them? I shan’t ask more but I want to know at least that.
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But fine. No means no.
You know, when I am a model citizen and perfectly boring, I shall blame you. My best friend.
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[Somehow D'Artagnan finds himself more amused by that than horrified. Something tame for Eponine, he believes.]
Well, you need not be boring, but perhaps less volatile and unruly. I expect some amount of disorderly conduct to persist.
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My punishments are always so long. It’s not fair.
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Than stop insulting people unnecessarily.
[Advice he will never take himself, but he gives it all the same.]
I've one for a month, far tamer, but you are not the only one subject to lengthy punishments. You need not pity yourself so, Eponine.
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what's yours? what did you do?
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[His only punishment is boredom.]
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do you think ill get away with it if I stay in the down? not in a house?
I need a break from gokudera.
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If you've the intent to return to the Up in a matter of days, you might. You can't stay with me, however. I'm certain they're monitoring things with the device they've given me.
[He mostly wouldn't care for himself, but he does have a roommate and he'll not drag the woman into citations with Eponine.]
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I dont know if ill return. He's being a
a dickhead.
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[He's never met Gokudera and can't make assumptions on the man's intent or likely offence.]
If it's the latter, I'd suggest returning before you've gotten yourself in more trouble.
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now he's saying its up to me and honestly D'Artagnan, my head is all over. all I want is to drink myself into oblivion and curl up with my bottle on a doorstep until morning.
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You know the community centre? There’s a doorway there. That one or in a building by the Obelisk. They’re all empty there
(no subject)