hey. i feel terrible about how our last conversation went. i didn't ask you out out of pity, but i screw everything up so it doesn't surprise me i bombed that, too.
if you're only interested in sex and not the other stuff, it's fine. i can give that to you.
fucking is fun. But I want to be friends too. I don’t want it a service. I have ‘done it’ for many men but they’re johns. They’re for money or favours or because I had to. It is not a feeling. I want a feeling too.
of course we're friends. that was why i was honest with you. really honest, not like those creeps who would just say something to put you down so they could manipulate you.
i didn't say what i did to try and insult you. i was giving my perspective, which is what a real friend would do. i hate that you were treated like that. someone who didn't care would just ignore it and take what they wanted from you anyway.
but I want you to ignore it and forget it. it has happened and truly, it is not so bad. there are hundreds of women as I am, Malcolm, where I am from. to you it is shocking but to me? it is how things is. were.
and now they're not and I am just some girl who thinks a boy is handsome and wishes he thought her pretty too. and if he did, maybe he should stop thinking and just come to her apartment and kiss her. Stop thinking, Malcolm. just... think with your heart.
[There's a few different things he typed out in earnest, about how it isn't easy to forget, it isn't easy to just stop, it isn't easy to--whatever. All of it just ends up backspaced, rewritten, and ultimately erased entirely. Malcolm finally huffs in irritation and sends just that, thoroughly annoyed with himself. It's still better than leaving her in suspense, even though the effort had him wasting another 15-20ish minutes on his own stupid nonsense. But you can't go wrong with anticipation either, right? At least, he hopes that's what the affirmation ultimately brings.
Eponine is only a floor beneath him, so he clomps down the stairs and makes it to her room in just a few minutes after sending that text, swallowing hard before rapping his knuckles against the door.]
[She stands back, awkwardly opening the door for Malcolm to come in. Her room is obviously crammed: her roommates stuff litters half of the room. Eponine's is really tidy; she's really proud of her room. With what little she's got, she's done her best to make it pretty. A paper doll lies on the night stand. It's tattered and obviously well loved.]
We can sit on the bed? If you like?
[She smooths her cover down and sits awkwardly, and pats the space next to her.]
I do think you're lovely though. The most lovely boy I've met.
[Taking notice of the state of the room reminds him of his budding frustration that she's still keeping herself here in the first place, when she's had a much better option practically gift-wrapped and delivered to her. But there's a time and place to nag her about that, and it isn't now.]
Okay. [Malcolm takes the invitation to sit down beside her, casually scuffling the toe of his shoe across the floor in front of them. There are so many swirling uncertainties right now, he can't even grab hold of a single one of them. To say his brain is like soup isn't quite the apt metaphor. Maybe more like soup that's threatening to boil over. He lets out a frustrated sigh and twists his hands together in his lap.]
Listen, Eponine, I-- [Right. The whole... stopping thing. Malcolm gives up, cuts himself off there, and leans in to give Eponine that very kiss she'd been so patient in asking for, lips sealed to hers.]
[Eponine freezes. She has no idea what to do. What do you do? She knows what to do - but when a kiss means something? What do you do?
It's a solid beat before she breathes, before she kisses back. Her hands find Malcolm's in his lap and she twists her fingers with his. There's a tingling in her belly, a completely unfamiliar sensation and she doesn't know whether she needs to burp or laugh or just keep kissing. So she does. She kisses Malcolm, gently encouraging him to open his mouth, to deepen the kiss, to let her taste him. For a few moments, she lets herself close her eyes and lose herself in the sensation, in her imagination of being loved.
[As soon as Eponine coaxes him to deepen it, he does just that, unthreading their fingers so he can rest a hand on her shoulder. Once she drifts back from him, Malcolm opens his eyes, blinking as the room refocuses.]
I'm supposed to be the one who asks that. [A quiet, wry laugh.] But-- yes. Of course.
[He hadn't imagined her to be the type to second-guess her kissing. It's actually quite endearing. Malcolm smiles and moves his hand from her shoulder to sweep his fingers through a lock of her hair, affectionately tucking it behind her ear.]
[Because even if she thinks he's 'nice', he's also an 18 year old guy, and... well, yeah. He may not want to be a creeper, but he'll still happily take any physical touch where he can get it.
The compliment does make him smile though, perhaps a bit shyly himself. Malcolm turns his head to kiss the back of Eponine's fingers where she's touched his face, and his thumb casually brushes against her jawline.]
[She trails her hand down his chest and over his stomach until she can touch his waist. Gently, she moves away from him so she can pull off the top she is wearing. Beneath it, she's wearing a long line black bra that accentuates her breast and emphasises her slim physique.]
You can touch if you like? I'd like you to, you know?
[Malcolm watches as Eponine pulls back enough to take her top off. Damn, but that was unexpected. Unexpected, but certainly not unpleasantly so. He'd meant to ease into it with more kissing, but this is completely fine, too.
To match, he reaches behind his head to pull his t-shirt up and off, tossing it somewhere to the corner of the bed and shifting closer.]
You're really pretty.
[And he sounds like a complete moron. Great.
Malcolm's hands slide over her smooth shoulders, and he bends in to kiss her some more, light on the corner of her mouth. Then he's capturing her lips more firmly, and his palms drag over the swell of her breasts, rough fingertips dipping under her bra before moving around to splay across her back and catch hold of the fastenings there.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
text | un: covalent
Date: 2023-08-28 02:21 pm (UTC)if you're only interested in sex and not the other stuff, it's fine. i can give that to you.
no subject
Date: 2023-08-29 07:43 am (UTC)Just sex?
I mean
Thank you
no subject
Date: 2023-08-29 11:05 am (UTC)so, what would you want?
no subject
Date: 2023-08-29 11:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-08-29 11:50 am (UTC)i didn't say what i did to try and insult you. i was giving my perspective, which is what a real friend would do. i hate that you were treated like that. someone who didn't care would just ignore it and take what they wanted from you anyway.
no subject
Date: 2023-09-02 09:51 pm (UTC)and now they're not and I am just some girl who thinks a boy is handsome and wishes he thought her pretty too. and if he did, maybe he should stop thinking and just come to her apartment and kiss her. Stop thinking, Malcolm. just... think with your heart.
no subject
Date: 2023-09-02 10:18 pm (UTC)[There's a few different things he typed out in earnest, about how it isn't easy to forget, it isn't easy to just stop, it isn't easy to--whatever. All of it just ends up backspaced, rewritten, and ultimately erased entirely. Malcolm finally huffs in irritation and sends just that, thoroughly annoyed with himself. It's still better than leaving her in suspense, even though the effort had him wasting another 15-20ish minutes on his own stupid nonsense. But you can't go wrong with anticipation either, right? At least, he hopes that's what the affirmation ultimately brings.
Eponine is only a floor beneath him, so he clomps down the stairs and makes it to her room in just a few minutes after sending that text, swallowing hard before rapping his knuckles against the door.]
no subject
Date: 2023-09-02 10:31 pm (UTC)But Eponine hopes and when that knock comes she opens the door and her face breaks out into a radiant smile.]
I were scared your heart didn't like me. Or your brain was too noisy for you to listen. That's why you're here, no?
no subject
Date: 2023-09-02 10:43 pm (UTC)[He smiles back, probably looking about as awkward as he feels.]
Uh... so can I come in?
no subject
Date: 2023-09-03 11:01 pm (UTC)[She stands back, awkwardly opening the door for Malcolm to come in. Her room is obviously crammed: her roommates stuff litters half of the room. Eponine's is really tidy; she's really proud of her room. With what little she's got, she's done her best to make it pretty. A paper doll lies on the night stand. It's tattered and obviously well loved.]
We can sit on the bed? If you like?
[She smooths her cover down and sits awkwardly, and pats the space next to her.]
I do think you're lovely though. The most lovely boy I've met.
no subject
Date: 2023-09-03 11:28 pm (UTC)Okay. [Malcolm takes the invitation to sit down beside her, casually scuffling the toe of his shoe across the floor in front of them. There are so many swirling uncertainties right now, he can't even grab hold of a single one of them. To say his brain is like soup isn't quite the apt metaphor. Maybe more like soup that's threatening to boil over. He lets out a frustrated sigh and twists his hands together in his lap.]
Listen, Eponine, I-- [Right. The whole... stopping thing. Malcolm gives up, cuts himself off there, and leans in to give Eponine that very kiss she'd been so patient in asking for, lips sealed to hers.]
no subject
Date: 2023-10-03 07:27 pm (UTC)It's a solid beat before she breathes, before she kisses back. Her hands find Malcolm's in his lap and she twists her fingers with his. There's a tingling in her belly, a completely unfamiliar sensation and she doesn't know whether she needs to burp or laugh or just keep kissing. So she does. She kisses Malcolm, gently encouraging him to open his mouth, to deepen the kiss, to let her taste him. For a few moments, she lets herself close her eyes and lose herself in the sensation, in her imagination of being loved.
And then she pulls away. Sheepishly, she asks,]
Was it right?
no subject
Date: 2023-10-04 02:23 am (UTC)I'm supposed to be the one who asks that. [A quiet, wry laugh.] But-- yes. Of course.
[He hadn't imagined her to be the type to second-guess her kissing. It's actually quite endearing. Malcolm smiles and moves his hand from her shoulder to sweep his fingers through a lock of her hair, affectionately tucking it behind her ear.]
no subject
Date: 2023-10-04 06:01 am (UTC)[She smiles shyly.]
Is there anything you’re not good at?
[His hand in her hair even for the brief moment feels so lovely. She reaches to stroke his cheek with her knuckles.]
You really are beautiful, you know, Malcolm.
no subject
Date: 2023-10-05 08:23 pm (UTC)[Because even if she thinks he's 'nice', he's also an 18 year old guy, and... well, yeah. He may not want to be a creeper, but he'll still happily take any physical touch where he can get it.
The compliment does make him smile though, perhaps a bit shyly himself. Malcolm turns his head to kiss the back of Eponine's fingers where she's touched his face, and his thumb casually brushes against her jawline.]
no subject
Date: 2023-10-09 07:26 pm (UTC)[She trails her hand down his chest and over his stomach until she can touch his waist. Gently, she moves away from him so she can pull off the top she is wearing. Beneath it, she's wearing a long line black bra that accentuates her breast and emphasises her slim physique.]
You can touch if you like? I'd like you to, you know?
no subject
Date: 2023-10-13 02:08 am (UTC)To match, he reaches behind his head to pull his t-shirt up and off, tossing it somewhere to the corner of the bed and shifting closer.]
You're really pretty.
[And he sounds like a complete moron. Great.
Malcolm's hands slide over her smooth shoulders, and he bends in to kiss her some more, light on the corner of her mouth. Then he's capturing her lips more firmly, and his palms drag over the swell of her breasts, rough fingertips dipping under her bra before moving around to splay across her back and catch hold of the fastenings there.]